Shawn Knight just sent me an article on his blog about the intense tornado activities in the Mid-South USA. The pictures are just mind-blowing. Most people in Vancouver, which is where I call home for the time being, have no idea what a tornado really is like, because we don’t have it here. However I could relate to Shawn’s article because I grew up in Missouri, USA, which neighbours the famous Mississippi River, and Kansas City as well as Kansas State, and during my 2 years there, I’ve seen my share of tornadoes.

In Kindergarten and Elementary School, we used to have tornado drills, as it was a frequent visitor in the prarie area that we lived in. The drill was to either get to the basement part of a building, or, if that’s unavailable, go to what would be considered the deepest core of the building, in order to minimize your chances of being hit by flying debris. In case of schools, those were the hallways. Classrooms would be evacuated, so as to minimize the chances of getting hit by flying glass. Once you hit the hallway, you would crouch like a turtle, with your knees to your chest and your arms wrapping your head, into a small ball, with your head directly against the walls. This was supposed to reduce the chance of you getting blown away, or getting hit by other objects, in case the intensity of the tornado rips through part of the building. Even if the roof got blown away, this covert position would reduce surface area, and help to keep you on the floor, in the building.

Tornado alarms were installed in all the municipalities, and that thing was so loud and the noise hit a large area. It was a long wailing sound, sort of like a ambulance siren except much longer in its high-low wave. When you hear that, your best bet is to hide according to your drills. Our apartment was on the 2nd floor, but in such places, neighbours are always there to help. Anybody living in lower floors would happily welcome their neighbours into their apartments to hide out during a tornado blast. All apartments were built with the first floor as half-basements, specifically for tornadoes. Most houses were built like that too, if they did not have a full basement under it! Even the architecture of such towns were affected largely by this powerful natural phenomenon.

When I went back to Korea, however, the government was not so much interested in natural disaster relief, but leaned more towards wartime provisions. There was training for bombings and other aerial attacks that may incur in our city, which was 4 hours away from the North Korean border. This was not only for schools, but it was a city-wide provision. All schools, offices, and homes were to comply when this happens. If I remember correctly, everybody was supposed to be indoors during that short period, but it was not enforced very well. It had been more than 40 years since the Korean War, and not many people took it seriously. However they would still do the military drill of emergency take offs and what not, as well as police officers being put on alert until the military took over.

And then I came to Vancouver, and went to highschool in the GVA (Greater Vancouver Area). We are located on the Pacific plate belt, or whatever it’s called, and we’re considered to be at high-risk for earthquakes. We constantly had earthquake drills, where we’d hide under a table or desk to avoid being hit by falling objects. And then, before the second wave would hit, we’d all evacuate through the designated evacuation routes, assemble with our teacher, in order to make sure the head-count matched from when the class begun, so that missing students can be easily identified and searched for.

Growing up in 3 different countries, in very distinct environments has given me such a wide array of emergency preparation training, and it’s actually quite amazing that I managed to experience all this throughout my life.

Does anybody else have any interesting anti-disaster training that’s not often seen in many parts of the world?

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washingtonchemistry mid term.

The answer by one student was so “profound” that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, “It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,” and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct……leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting “Oh my God.”

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.